http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071217/ap_on_re_us/death_penalty_new_jersey
This is an encouraging story, with one state in the union speaking out against capital punishment and setting an example. As expected, hardcore Republicans and victims' families call it "a slap in the face to the victims" and that "the punishment no longer fits the crime." The victims themselves have already suffered, and no amount of executions will reverse it. All it does is satisfy the base need for revenge. It doesn't help anyone but grieving families, and I can't see that it helps them that much. A member of their family is still dead. Although the momentary need for retribution might be satisfied, the void left by the initial death isn't filled by the death of another. I encourage anyone interested in this issue to read "Reflections on the Guillotine" by Albert Camus, which helped strengthen my previous on-the-fence view of capital punishment into an ardent opposition, along with what I've read about criminal profilers and the insights they've gained into the minds of murderers due to interviews that never could have been conducted if the killers had been immediately executed. Robert Ressler, a pioneering FBI profiler, also speaks out against the death penalty in his book Whoever Fights Monsters. The title of his book is taken from a famous quote by Fredrich Nietzche, which is good advice for all law enforcement officials and any wannabe vigilantes (this might not be the exact wording): "He who fights monsters should fight to make sure that he does not become a monster." When tracking the worst of humanity, it's easy to be swept up in revenge fantasies of causing harm to these human monsters, but laws regarding criminal prosecution are there for a reason, because it's so easy to get carried away, and possibly take out one's rage on the wrong person while blinded by rage. I know I'm very different from others, I've been hearing it all my life, and I might not understand "normal" emotions, but I feel that a life behind bars, with nothing but time with the memories of their victims, is punishment enough for a violent criminal. Also, as I've said before, I find the raging cries for execution, which differ very little from savage bloodlust, from many victims' families and the public in general, very disturbing. It's a reminder of the violent urges that lurk in all of us, that we usually manage to control, and need to control for the sake of our society.
Still no good news on the job front. The fact that I left my last job because I was stifled and miserable is very likely affecting my search, but I was thinking about that today, after again not hearing any news. If I left a job because I was unhappy and unproductive, then employers should see my interest in their company as genuine, because I'm not the type to just take any job to make money (although I'm starting to get to that point). But of course, there's very little logic involved in employers' standards, or everyday human interaction.
Monday, December 17, 2007
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Colorado church shooting
http://news.yahoo.com/fc/US/Colorado_Church_Shootings;_ylt=Ao6Pf39fYtjDy9EEh0h7IEdH2ocA
Despite Matthew Murray's anti-Christian diatribes posted online, his motive for opening fire in New Life Church and its youth group building was clearly something far baser and simpler: revenge. Murray was "asked to leave" the church's Youth with a Mission group for undisclosed reasons before his rampage. He wasn't acting on demonic influences or anti-Christian violence; it was just revenge, the motive for so many mass murderers and a familiar one that crosses racial and religious lines. Murray was, like Robert Hawkins in Nebraska, a typical mass murderer: young white male with a grudge and, it appears, mental problems. I just hope the general public remembers this while the nutjob Christians turn this incident into a rallying point for paranoia that the whole world is out to get them for their godliness. And they will; it's what they do.
An interesting side note: the church security guard who stopped Murray by firing a shot and deemed a hero, was reportedly fired from the local police force for lying during an internal investigation, if I read the bottom paragraph of one of the stories correctly. Another side note: New Life Church was founded by disgraced evangelical leader Ted Haggard, brought down by his hypocrisy and lust for male prostitutes.
Despite Matthew Murray's anti-Christian diatribes posted online, his motive for opening fire in New Life Church and its youth group building was clearly something far baser and simpler: revenge. Murray was "asked to leave" the church's Youth with a Mission group for undisclosed reasons before his rampage. He wasn't acting on demonic influences or anti-Christian violence; it was just revenge, the motive for so many mass murderers and a familiar one that crosses racial and religious lines. Murray was, like Robert Hawkins in Nebraska, a typical mass murderer: young white male with a grudge and, it appears, mental problems. I just hope the general public remembers this while the nutjob Christians turn this incident into a rallying point for paranoia that the whole world is out to get them for their godliness. And they will; it's what they do.
An interesting side note: the church security guard who stopped Murray by firing a shot and deemed a hero, was reportedly fired from the local police force for lying during an internal investigation, if I read the bottom paragraph of one of the stories correctly. Another side note: New Life Church was founded by disgraced evangelical leader Ted Haggard, brought down by his hypocrisy and lust for male prostitutes.
Thursday, December 06, 2007
Mass murder in Nebraska mall
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071206/ap_on_re_us/mall_shooting_gunman;_ylt=Ah_BwsKfvqTvng7IepU8lLhH2ocA
19-year-old Robert Hawkins killed six people in a department store before shooting himself. Hawkins fit the prototype of the mass murderer; a history of depression, high school dropout, and a week before his rampage, he had been fired from his job. And of course, those who knew him never saw it coming. Although his friend's mother, who he was living with, found a suicide note the day of the shooting, she never thought Hawkins' suicide would reach the level it did. Hawkins left a note saying, along with expressing regret for the trouble he caused, "Now I'm famous." A depressed nobody trying to make a name for himself with an elaborate suicide; the textbook mass murder. Fifty years ago, Nebraska was the site of another teenager on a killing spree, Charles Starkweather. Starkweather was not on a suicidal mission, but still wanted to make a name for himself and find an outlet for his rage against society.
I have a job interview tomorrow, after showing up late to my interview today. Serves me right for thinking I could get to an address in Falls Church, an area I know nothing about. But tomorrow, I know exacly where I'm going, and will do my best to make the best possible impression. I've been jobless for far too long, and I'm starting to get paranoid about never having an income again. On a positive note, Anthony, the guy I met at Bound right before Thanksgiving, is coming back from his business trip tomorrow. He's been gone for almost three weeks, and I miss him. With the one good thing in my life now temporarily gone, no wonder I slipped into one of my depressions and tried to drink it away last Friday. But maybe it's good that he left for a while. It gave me a chance to miss him, to long for him. It sounds strange, but for most of my life, a guy had to be at least temporarily unavailable for me to be interested. If Anthony gets called out of town often enough, this might actually work, a concept that frightens me a bit because it's so unusual in my life.
19-year-old Robert Hawkins killed six people in a department store before shooting himself. Hawkins fit the prototype of the mass murderer; a history of depression, high school dropout, and a week before his rampage, he had been fired from his job. And of course, those who knew him never saw it coming. Although his friend's mother, who he was living with, found a suicide note the day of the shooting, she never thought Hawkins' suicide would reach the level it did. Hawkins left a note saying, along with expressing regret for the trouble he caused, "Now I'm famous." A depressed nobody trying to make a name for himself with an elaborate suicide; the textbook mass murder. Fifty years ago, Nebraska was the site of another teenager on a killing spree, Charles Starkweather. Starkweather was not on a suicidal mission, but still wanted to make a name for himself and find an outlet for his rage against society.
I have a job interview tomorrow, after showing up late to my interview today. Serves me right for thinking I could get to an address in Falls Church, an area I know nothing about. But tomorrow, I know exacly where I'm going, and will do my best to make the best possible impression. I've been jobless for far too long, and I'm starting to get paranoid about never having an income again. On a positive note, Anthony, the guy I met at Bound right before Thanksgiving, is coming back from his business trip tomorrow. He's been gone for almost three weeks, and I miss him. With the one good thing in my life now temporarily gone, no wonder I slipped into one of my depressions and tried to drink it away last Friday. But maybe it's good that he left for a while. It gave me a chance to miss him, to long for him. It sounds strange, but for most of my life, a guy had to be at least temporarily unavailable for me to be interested. If Anthony gets called out of town often enough, this might actually work, a concept that frightens me a bit because it's so unusual in my life.
Sunday, December 02, 2007
Another bad night
I have been trying to crawl out of a cavern of shame since Friday night. I went to the Black Cat for Cryfest (a Cure/Smiths night) and was having a great time until I had a bit of a fifth drink. There must have been something in that drink, or I was officially over my limit, because all of a sudden the staff was trying to throw me out. It wasn't until this happened that I started to get unruly, demanding that I be allowed to get my coat from upstairs. After telling them exactly where my coat was, that it was long black wool and had a Metro card in the left pocket, I get a short black coat with no pockets. I'm not saying that the staff of the Black Cat is stupid, but after giving the same description to a friend who luckily happened to be outside at the time, he quickly came back with the right coat (Thanks so much Joel, I owe you big). What's worse, after the staff tried to give me the wrong coat, they said I'd have to come back tomorrow and make my way home with no coat or Metro card. They'll have to forgive me for not exactly trusting them to hold onto anything overnight. Even when I was crying outside after being told to come back in the morning, and was not causing any more trouble, they refused to let me back in. I know it's all over now, and it worked out for the best, but I keep thinking; what if things hadn't worked out? What if Joel hadn't been outside? What if I had kept shouting and the staff called the cops and I ended up in jail? All I should be thinking about is how I narrowly escaped a disastrous moment, and what I can learn from it. Drinking has always been a social crutch of mine. I become more talkative and less reserved when I drink, and I try to keep it going. It's caused other problems in the past, mostly sex-related with guys I never should have even talked to, but never anything on this level. I was fine until I started on that fifth drink. A guy who was clearly trying to get in my pants bought it for me, so I have my suspicions, especially after I started acting like a maniac immediately after I took a sip. But it was probably just too much alcohol combined with the natural stress of having to explain myself to an unyielding staff who doesn't appear to be helping. I've told myself before, after yet another disappointing one-night stand, that I will drink less, but it never sticks. I'm hoping that, remembering my embarrassing Friday night, I'll make it stick this time.
Before I went out on Friday, I learned that my grandfather had died after a long, off and on struggle with cancer. It hadn't even hit me when I headed out that my grandfather was dead. He was among my favorite extended relatives, but I can't say we were exactly close. In a perverted way, maybe getting drunk and making an ass of myself was the best way to honor his memory, in the spirit his alcoholic Irish Catholic clan.
Before I went out on Friday, I learned that my grandfather had died after a long, off and on struggle with cancer. It hadn't even hit me when I headed out that my grandfather was dead. He was among my favorite extended relatives, but I can't say we were exactly close. In a perverted way, maybe getting drunk and making an ass of myself was the best way to honor his memory, in the spirit his alcoholic Irish Catholic clan.
Friday, November 23, 2007
A rash of domestic murders in Maryland
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071123/ap_on_re_us/five_dead
Domestic murder is the most common type of murder, and the type most often committed by women. The reason for this, why when a woman is murdered the husband is always the prime suspect and often the killer, is, as a friend told me a while ago, most of us have to have a strong emotional connection to someone to get to the point of even considering killing them. Only psychopaths or other emotional defectives feel the urge to kill a total stranger. Or someone so greedy or desperate who kills for money. As the article states, there have been several high-profile incidents in Maryland this past year, often with children as the victims. The murder of a child, especially by their own parents, is always disturbing. Children are almost always innocent victims, caught in the crosshairs of either a mother's severe postpartum depression, one spouse's desire for revenge against the other, or a parent's mental illness. And with most parents' will to protect their children against any type of ill, up to the point of sacrificing their own lives, when a parent ends their child's life, it's an exceptionally sad story, but all too common.
The guy I recently met, though currently out of town, is still calling me frequently, and I saw him again last weekend and had another great night. I'm almost to the point of forgetting the asshole who wanders in and out of my life, who until now I thought could be the love of my life, if he would only stick around. But now I see him for what he is, a coward who can't even tell me his whole story. But this new guy is different, at least that's how it feels at the moment. And I might have a new job soon, if I don't blow this interview like I often have the past few months, if I get that far in my job hunt, which has been rare.
Domestic murder is the most common type of murder, and the type most often committed by women. The reason for this, why when a woman is murdered the husband is always the prime suspect and often the killer, is, as a friend told me a while ago, most of us have to have a strong emotional connection to someone to get to the point of even considering killing them. Only psychopaths or other emotional defectives feel the urge to kill a total stranger. Or someone so greedy or desperate who kills for money. As the article states, there have been several high-profile incidents in Maryland this past year, often with children as the victims. The murder of a child, especially by their own parents, is always disturbing. Children are almost always innocent victims, caught in the crosshairs of either a mother's severe postpartum depression, one spouse's desire for revenge against the other, or a parent's mental illness. And with most parents' will to protect their children against any type of ill, up to the point of sacrificing their own lives, when a parent ends their child's life, it's an exceptionally sad story, but all too common.
The guy I recently met, though currently out of town, is still calling me frequently, and I saw him again last weekend and had another great night. I'm almost to the point of forgetting the asshole who wanders in and out of my life, who until now I thought could be the love of my life, if he would only stick around. But now I see him for what he is, a coward who can't even tell me his whole story. But this new guy is different, at least that's how it feels at the moment. And I might have a new job soon, if I don't blow this interview like I often have the past few months, if I get that far in my job hunt, which has been rare.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
The Democratic Presidential candidates
The candidates for President on both sides leave much to be desired. But on the Democratic side, it's particularly distressing. Hillary Clinton, despite being reviled by the right, is displaying increasing levels of Howard Dean-style unfocused insanity, and appears to absolutely refuse to answer questions in a concrete manner. Barak Obama, despite his early promise, has now turned all God-warrior on us, allying with anti-gay ministers, and also refusing to answer questions with anything but empty optimistic phrases. I still hold out a shred of hope for Obama, but I feel he has overstepped his limitations by running for President so soon. And while John Edwards gained my respect with a very strong performance in the 2004 Vice Presidential debate against Der Fuhrer Cheney, after Bill Clinton, the nation is wary of another smooth-talking southerner. I have a soft spot for Joe Biden and his unrehearsed honesty, but unrehearsed honesty doesn't get one far in the political sphere, and it's not enough to hold up a successful Presidency. And while the borderline Marxist in me also has inclinations toward Dennis Kucinich, I don't see how his ideals will translate to the anti-Marxist American stage. But there is one faint beacon of hope: Bill Richardson, the very successful and popular governor of New Mexico. Richardson is a champion of civil rights, an advocate of the environment, opposes the Iraq occupation, supports tax fairness, and, most importantly, has made affordable health care and quality education his top priorities, recognizing the Bush administration's failings in both areas. For transcripts of his cogent and eloquent speeches and outlines of positions, go to http://www.richardsonforpresident.com/home Richardson also gets points for recognizing America's energy crisis, and as former Secretary of Energy, he should know. Richardson has also been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize for his work in the Middle East and Darfur activism. While all things are subject to change, for the time being, Godless Liberal is endorsing the Honorable Governor Bill Richardson for the next President of the United States.
Maryland's governor, Martin O'Malley, has made some promising strides of his own in his short time as head of the state. I heard him speak on Thursday at Progressive Maryland's awards banquet. While some called his speech a "downer," I found his honesty about the hard road ahead refreshing. O'Malley passed the nation's first living wage law, and is doing his best to close the state's deficit and undo Ehrlich's various damages. And it says something about O'Malley that he is willing to be identified with Progressive Maryland, a group Ehrlich called "wack-jobs." I consider the former governor's words an endorsement. In his pro-rich and pro-business eyes, I guess any group who advocates a slight tax increase for the super-rich is a wack-job. And we wear that tag with honor. Also, Martin O'Malley, unlike many politicians, has a good sense of humor. When one of Progressive Maryland's team members put on a George Bush mask and wandered by the governor doing an impression of our President in name only, O'Malley was, according to those who saw the incident, laughing his ass off.
Here ends my political rant. Not as informed as I would like, and I may come out looking stupid as a result of my lack of thorough research, but for now, I'm comfortable with my positions. And being a member of Progressive Maryland has not only increased my comfort in social situations, but I am also learning more about various social injustices and how to start solving them. But, American politics sure is depressing. No wonder so many of us prefer not to think about it.
Maryland's governor, Martin O'Malley, has made some promising strides of his own in his short time as head of the state. I heard him speak on Thursday at Progressive Maryland's awards banquet. While some called his speech a "downer," I found his honesty about the hard road ahead refreshing. O'Malley passed the nation's first living wage law, and is doing his best to close the state's deficit and undo Ehrlich's various damages. And it says something about O'Malley that he is willing to be identified with Progressive Maryland, a group Ehrlich called "wack-jobs." I consider the former governor's words an endorsement. In his pro-rich and pro-business eyes, I guess any group who advocates a slight tax increase for the super-rich is a wack-job. And we wear that tag with honor. Also, Martin O'Malley, unlike many politicians, has a good sense of humor. When one of Progressive Maryland's team members put on a George Bush mask and wandered by the governor doing an impression of our President in name only, O'Malley was, according to those who saw the incident, laughing his ass off.
Here ends my political rant. Not as informed as I would like, and I may come out looking stupid as a result of my lack of thorough research, but for now, I'm comfortable with my positions. And being a member of Progressive Maryland has not only increased my comfort in social situations, but I am also learning more about various social injustices and how to start solving them. But, American politics sure is depressing. No wonder so many of us prefer not to think about it.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Norman Mailer dead at 84
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071110/ap_on_en_ot/obit_mailer;_ylt=Au_V2CYMWHJ9VUEGkk_n7Oes0NUE
He may have been a misogynistic asshole in his private life, married six times and almost fatally stabbing his second wife, but Norman Mailer was still a towering figure in American literature. I will always admire him for his iconoclasm and fighting into his last days with "President" George W. Bush, calling Bush on his "pre-fascist" regime.
Todd and I were talking last night at Bound about the very lackluster attendance. Where are all of you? We have a decent space, great music and people, but we're still about 100 guests short. Bound is the only goth-industrial event in DC on Fridays. We need you, and you need us. Still, I managed to have a good night, until I left. I met a great guy named Anthony, who I'm seeing again tonight, and we talked about movies and literature and stupid people, which are among my favorite topics. At the end of the night, around 2 am, he had to drive his friend home, and since he lives near me, he offered me a ride. This was very nice of him, and I wanted more time with him, so I accepted. Bad idea. Not because of Anthony, but because his friend brought some military friends who had to be taken back to base in Southwest. They didn't see the entrance at first, so we had to basically circle around the city to find our way back, which took a very long time. And on our way, we got stuck behind an accident, and had to wait until the ambulances cleared. Luckily, Anthony had some Dave Attell standup routines on his iPod, which helped lighten the mood. It was about 4:30 when we finally got the uniforms back to their barrack. They were lucky I didn't throw them onto the ground myself. To give an idea of how long the trip took, after finishing my fifth drink at the club right before we left, I was completely sober by the time we got to the barracks. Then after that long and painful trip, we had to go to Gaithersburg to drop off a girl at her car, then drive Anthony's friend out to Frederick. I got home at 6 am. By the time we got to my house, I had never had to pee so bad in my life. Still, I enjoyed meeting Anthony, and am looking forward to seeing him tonight. We're going to AFI to see "Taxidermia," a Hungarian film that's part of the European Union Film Showcase. The lesson to be learned in our drive around the circling highways of DC in search of a military base is this: I don't care how they've served their country, never give a soldier a ride home in the wee hours of the morning.
I've met a great guy (the great guy I saw again last week after months of not communicating has stopped communicating yet again, and of course I still can't stop thinking about him), started a not-great but still interesting part-time job at Progressive Maryland with some very cool people, and I have an interview on Monday to work as an SAT tutor. Is my life finally starting to turn around? Or is this just a mirage of a high before my inevitable fall? I guess I should enjoy the good times while they last.
He may have been a misogynistic asshole in his private life, married six times and almost fatally stabbing his second wife, but Norman Mailer was still a towering figure in American literature. I will always admire him for his iconoclasm and fighting into his last days with "President" George W. Bush, calling Bush on his "pre-fascist" regime.
Todd and I were talking last night at Bound about the very lackluster attendance. Where are all of you? We have a decent space, great music and people, but we're still about 100 guests short. Bound is the only goth-industrial event in DC on Fridays. We need you, and you need us. Still, I managed to have a good night, until I left. I met a great guy named Anthony, who I'm seeing again tonight, and we talked about movies and literature and stupid people, which are among my favorite topics. At the end of the night, around 2 am, he had to drive his friend home, and since he lives near me, he offered me a ride. This was very nice of him, and I wanted more time with him, so I accepted. Bad idea. Not because of Anthony, but because his friend brought some military friends who had to be taken back to base in Southwest. They didn't see the entrance at first, so we had to basically circle around the city to find our way back, which took a very long time. And on our way, we got stuck behind an accident, and had to wait until the ambulances cleared. Luckily, Anthony had some Dave Attell standup routines on his iPod, which helped lighten the mood. It was about 4:30 when we finally got the uniforms back to their barrack. They were lucky I didn't throw them onto the ground myself. To give an idea of how long the trip took, after finishing my fifth drink at the club right before we left, I was completely sober by the time we got to the barracks. Then after that long and painful trip, we had to go to Gaithersburg to drop off a girl at her car, then drive Anthony's friend out to Frederick. I got home at 6 am. By the time we got to my house, I had never had to pee so bad in my life. Still, I enjoyed meeting Anthony, and am looking forward to seeing him tonight. We're going to AFI to see "Taxidermia," a Hungarian film that's part of the European Union Film Showcase. The lesson to be learned in our drive around the circling highways of DC in search of a military base is this: I don't care how they've served their country, never give a soldier a ride home in the wee hours of the morning.
I've met a great guy (the great guy I saw again last week after months of not communicating has stopped communicating yet again, and of course I still can't stop thinking about him), started a not-great but still interesting part-time job at Progressive Maryland with some very cool people, and I have an interview on Monday to work as an SAT tutor. Is my life finally starting to turn around? Or is this just a mirage of a high before my inevitable fall? I guess I should enjoy the good times while they last.
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
School shooting in Finland
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071107/ap_on_re_eu/finland_school_shooting
Finland is a surprising place for a school shooting, an almost entirely American phenomenon. While gun ownership is more common in Finland than in the rest of Europe, the article states, shootings are still rare. The gunman shot several people in the school, including the principal, after putting up a plan for his rampage on YouTube, calling it a "revolution." He then shot himself, but survived. No other information about the shooter or his motives was included, but I will, of course, be following this story.
Some odd political news: Pat Robertson, professional religious wingnut and swindler of the faithful, is backing Rudy Giuliani for president. This is surprising because Giuliani, while I'm not a fan, is at least pro-choice and pro-gay rights, making him a bit too socially permissive and, well, rational for the crazy Christians Robertson represents.
A bit of good news: I officially start training at Progressive Maryland today. Not only am I employed again, I'll be working for something I can be proud of. And when I explained my dissatisfaction with my previous job during my interview, the interviewer not only understood, he fully sympathized and shared stories of corporate bullshit of his own. I think I could be happy there.
Finland is a surprising place for a school shooting, an almost entirely American phenomenon. While gun ownership is more common in Finland than in the rest of Europe, the article states, shootings are still rare. The gunman shot several people in the school, including the principal, after putting up a plan for his rampage on YouTube, calling it a "revolution." He then shot himself, but survived. No other information about the shooter or his motives was included, but I will, of course, be following this story.
Some odd political news: Pat Robertson, professional religious wingnut and swindler of the faithful, is backing Rudy Giuliani for president. This is surprising because Giuliani, while I'm not a fan, is at least pro-choice and pro-gay rights, making him a bit too socially permissive and, well, rational for the crazy Christians Robertson represents.
A bit of good news: I officially start training at Progressive Maryland today. Not only am I employed again, I'll be working for something I can be proud of. And when I explained my dissatisfaction with my previous job during my interview, the interviewer not only understood, he fully sympathized and shared stories of corporate bullshit of his own. I think I could be happy there.
Monday, November 05, 2007
A mob story from the old country
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071105/wl_nm/italy_mafia_arrests_dc
There's not much here, just the latest mob boss arrest in Sicily, a guy who was nicknamed "the Baron." Gotta love those Mafia nicknames. His archrival was "the Lawnmower," due to his method of mowing down hit targets. There's also another great Mafia power struggle story, which makes me wonder just how different the mob is from any American government organization or corporation.
On the job front, after months of sending out resumes with no responses, I received two responses in the space of one hour today. I now have two interviews, one with a coffee shop and one with Progressive Maryland, a grassroots political organization. Not my ideal job, but still a good cause, much better than the corporate bullshit I was once subjected to.
There's not much here, just the latest mob boss arrest in Sicily, a guy who was nicknamed "the Baron." Gotta love those Mafia nicknames. His archrival was "the Lawnmower," due to his method of mowing down hit targets. There's also another great Mafia power struggle story, which makes me wonder just how different the mob is from any American government organization or corporation.
On the job front, after months of sending out resumes with no responses, I received two responses in the space of one hour today. I now have two interviews, one with a coffee shop and one with Progressive Maryland, a grassroots political organization. Not my ideal job, but still a good cause, much better than the corporate bullshit I was once subjected to.
Saturday, November 03, 2007
Control review
The Joy Division movie Control is definitely worth seeing, not just for the energetic recreation of concert footage that is the closest we will ever get to witnessing a Joy Division show. Sam Riley's performance as the band's tormented lead singer, Ian Curtis, deserves every bit of each glowing review it has received. From his epileptic seizures to his early romantic naivete and later depression to his passionate stage shows, Riley nails every facet of Curtis' complex character, all while having the slim frame, black hair and pale skin to make him every high school goth girl's dream. The final moments, with Joy Division fans knowing how this tragic story will end, when Curtis is facing his homemade noose, then a cut to a wide shot of his wife discovering the unseen body, are heartbreaking. As "Atmosphere" plays over the closing credits, Curtis' solemn voice and sad lyrics take on a new significance. Also, I was thrilled that my favorite JD song, "She's Lost Control," was featured in the film. After coming home, I had to listen to my Joy Division albums.
Personal news: Had a great time at Bound last night. A big thanks to whichever DJ played "Red Right Hand." I met some great new people, and saw a guy I hadn't seen in months, the one who has been slipping in and out of my life ever since we met, when I felt he could be the love of my life. Despite the uncertainty of our history, I was happy to see him, and we got a chance to hang out and talk on our way home. I just hope he doesn't slip away again. But with some of my friends going through nasty divorces and drama-heavy breakups and reunions, maybe I shouldn't rush into anything.
Personal news: Had a great time at Bound last night. A big thanks to whichever DJ played "Red Right Hand." I met some great new people, and saw a guy I hadn't seen in months, the one who has been slipping in and out of my life ever since we met, when I felt he could be the love of my life. Despite the uncertainty of our history, I was happy to see him, and we got a chance to hang out and talk on our way home. I just hope he doesn't slip away again. But with some of my friends going through nasty divorces and drama-heavy breakups and reunions, maybe I shouldn't rush into anything.
Monday, October 29, 2007
You'll be coming down
Awesome Halloween weekend. The BUG party was a great time, anyone who was there probably heard me screaming. Entre Nous' Halloween bash wasn't as horribly crowded as last year, which made it more enjoyable. As always, there were some great costumes. My friend Scott showed major commitment to his Caesar outfit by wearing nothing but a cape and specially designed underwear, and cutting his hair to match. Holly looked very hot as Milla Jovovich in The Fifth Element, and I loved Jen's Princess Leia gold bikini. She's the only woman I know who could pull that off. But the best costume I saw was on the Metro Saturday night on my way to EN. A guy was wearing a Union blue Civil War uniform and hat, and was carrying a bottle. Yes, I'm guessing he was Ulysses S. Grant. Very clever. I wanted to make it to Cradle of Love last night, but I think I had reached my party quota for the weekend. I hope I can see Maverick's Charles Manson costume at an upcoming celebration.
I love Halloween, and celebrating with my friends, but, as is often the case, when I was out I started getting depressed in quiet moments and on the way home. Almost everyone around me was paired up, and I was alone. Sometimes I felt invisible, because I don't have the typical engaging personality, and I'm not exactly a flamboyant attention-grabber like some of my friends. I had a good time, and I'm glad I got out this weekend, but there's always a negative side. The fun passed, and yesterday I was left listening to the new Bruce Springsteen album (excellent, by the way), especially the second track, "You'll Be Coming Down." Something about it got to me, most likely the lyrics about fading youth and beauty, and everything good going bad eventually. After a fun weekend, I'm left listening to depressing music, knowing that for the rest of the week I'll still be unemployed and alone. I might have to leave the apartment I love after this month if I don't get a job soon, I'm too tired and depressed after doing nothing all day to go out or even write, and I never call the friends from the clubs because I assume they don't want to talk to me. I've made a lot of progress from high school, when I had no friends and hated myself to the point of hiding in my room and not talking to anyone, but I'm still too shy to go after a job I want or to develop a friendship, or to keep in contact with a guy who could be the love of my life. But please, don't let me spoil your Halloween fun. I'll figure a way out of this slump somehow.
YOU'LL BE COMIN' DOWN
white roses and misty blue eyes
red mornings, then nothin' but gray skies
a cup of coffee, a heart shot clean through
the jacket you bought me gone daisy gray-blue
you're smiling now but you'll find out
they'll use you up and spit you out now
your head's spinnin' in diamonds and clouds
but pretty soon it turns out
you'll be comin' down now baby
you'll be coming down
what goes around, it comes around and
you'll be comin' down
easy street, a quick buck and true lies
smiles as thin as those dusky blue skies
a silver plate of pearls my golden child
it's all yours at least for a little while
you'll be fine long as your pretty face holds out
then it's gonna get pretty cold out
an empty stream of stars shooting by
you got your hopes on high
you'll be comin' down now baby
you'll be coming down
what goes around, it comes around and
you'll be comin' down
for a while you'll go sparklin' by
just another pretty thing on high
like a thief on a sunday morning
it all falls apart with no warning
your cinnamon sky's gone candy-apple green
the crushed metal of your little flying machine
you'll be comin' down now baby
you'll be coming down
what goes around, it comes around and
you'll be comin' down
you'll be comin' down now baby
you'll be coming down
what goes around, it comes around and
you'll be comin' down
I love Halloween, and celebrating with my friends, but, as is often the case, when I was out I started getting depressed in quiet moments and on the way home. Almost everyone around me was paired up, and I was alone. Sometimes I felt invisible, because I don't have the typical engaging personality, and I'm not exactly a flamboyant attention-grabber like some of my friends. I had a good time, and I'm glad I got out this weekend, but there's always a negative side. The fun passed, and yesterday I was left listening to the new Bruce Springsteen album (excellent, by the way), especially the second track, "You'll Be Coming Down." Something about it got to me, most likely the lyrics about fading youth and beauty, and everything good going bad eventually. After a fun weekend, I'm left listening to depressing music, knowing that for the rest of the week I'll still be unemployed and alone. I might have to leave the apartment I love after this month if I don't get a job soon, I'm too tired and depressed after doing nothing all day to go out or even write, and I never call the friends from the clubs because I assume they don't want to talk to me. I've made a lot of progress from high school, when I had no friends and hated myself to the point of hiding in my room and not talking to anyone, but I'm still too shy to go after a job I want or to develop a friendship, or to keep in contact with a guy who could be the love of my life. But please, don't let me spoil your Halloween fun. I'll figure a way out of this slump somehow.
YOU'LL BE COMIN' DOWN
white roses and misty blue eyes
red mornings, then nothin' but gray skies
a cup of coffee, a heart shot clean through
the jacket you bought me gone daisy gray-blue
you're smiling now but you'll find out
they'll use you up and spit you out now
your head's spinnin' in diamonds and clouds
but pretty soon it turns out
you'll be comin' down now baby
you'll be coming down
what goes around, it comes around and
you'll be comin' down
easy street, a quick buck and true lies
smiles as thin as those dusky blue skies
a silver plate of pearls my golden child
it's all yours at least for a little while
you'll be fine long as your pretty face holds out
then it's gonna get pretty cold out
an empty stream of stars shooting by
you got your hopes on high
you'll be comin' down now baby
you'll be coming down
what goes around, it comes around and
you'll be comin' down
for a while you'll go sparklin' by
just another pretty thing on high
like a thief on a sunday morning
it all falls apart with no warning
your cinnamon sky's gone candy-apple green
the crushed metal of your little flying machine
you'll be comin' down now baby
you'll be coming down
what goes around, it comes around and
you'll be comin' down
you'll be comin' down now baby
you'll be coming down
what goes around, it comes around and
you'll be comin' down
Saturday, October 20, 2007
HIM and Bleeding Through rock the 9:30 Club
Awesome show last night. Bleeding Through, a hardcore punk band with a dark edge, gave the goths a chance to blow off steam before swooning and moping to the romantigoth sounds of HIM. Not that HIM can't rock, the hard renditions of "Wings of a Butterfly" and "My Sweet 666" proved that they are one of the last great rock bands. Unfortunately, due to either sound problems or the instruments, I couldn't always properly hear the piercing guitar that gives so many HIM songs such a powerful edge. Still, a great night at the 9:30 Club, surrounded by my fellow goths and freaks.
The after party at Bound was fun too, even though I had to take a detour around a crime scene to get to it. All I know is that someone fired shots in the area of the 9:30 Club, at a cop according to some rumors, but it seemed to have died down by the time the show was over. I got drunk at Bound, and went downstairs with a guy I met before one of my friends came over and, noticing how drunk I was and couldn't remember the guy's name, dragged me away. I resented it at the time, since I later realized I did know the guy's name, but it is good to have friends, especially when you're trapped in a haze of alcohol and happy that any guy is paying attention to you. The next best thing to not actually making stupid mistakes is having a friend with the foresight to stop you from taking that stupid mistake too far. Also, a big thanks to DJ Rex for keeping the crowd dancing last night, coming all the way from the UK.
The after party at Bound was fun too, even though I had to take a detour around a crime scene to get to it. All I know is that someone fired shots in the area of the 9:30 Club, at a cop according to some rumors, but it seemed to have died down by the time the show was over. I got drunk at Bound, and went downstairs with a guy I met before one of my friends came over and, noticing how drunk I was and couldn't remember the guy's name, dragged me away. I resented it at the time, since I later realized I did know the guy's name, but it is good to have friends, especially when you're trapped in a haze of alcohol and happy that any guy is paying attention to you. The next best thing to not actually making stupid mistakes is having a friend with the foresight to stop you from taking that stupid mistake too far. Also, a big thanks to DJ Rex for keeping the crowd dancing last night, coming all the way from the UK.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
New evidence clears Dr. Crippen
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071016/sc_nm/science_crippen_dc
A doctor who was accused of murdering his wife could be cleared by new evidence. Dr. Crippen protested his innocence all the way to the gallows, saying that the body found was not that of his wife, and this has been established by new DNA evidence, many years too late.
England, where Crippen was tried and hanged, has since abolished the death penalty, after another innocent man, framed by infamous "Monster of Rillington Place" John Reginald Christie, was posthumously pardoned. America is one of the few first-world countries hanging on to capital punishment, and is one of very few countries that executes juveniles (Iran and Pakistan are among the others). Will the Dr. Crippen case convince other governments to abolish this form of punishment? Probably not, at least while "Texas Justice" Bush is the figurehead of this country, with Dead-Eye Dick by his side. The Dr. Crippen case illustrates a fundamental problem with the death penalty. Death is definite, but human judgment is not. Judgment can be clouded by emotion, desire for revenge, prejudice, health, stress, and so many other factors. Which is a frightening thought when considering that someone else's life could depend on the quality of your judgment.
A doctor who was accused of murdering his wife could be cleared by new evidence. Dr. Crippen protested his innocence all the way to the gallows, saying that the body found was not that of his wife, and this has been established by new DNA evidence, many years too late.
England, where Crippen was tried and hanged, has since abolished the death penalty, after another innocent man, framed by infamous "Monster of Rillington Place" John Reginald Christie, was posthumously pardoned. America is one of the few first-world countries hanging on to capital punishment, and is one of very few countries that executes juveniles (Iran and Pakistan are among the others). Will the Dr. Crippen case convince other governments to abolish this form of punishment? Probably not, at least while "Texas Justice" Bush is the figurehead of this country, with Dead-Eye Dick by his side. The Dr. Crippen case illustrates a fundamental problem with the death penalty. Death is definite, but human judgment is not. Judgment can be clouded by emotion, desire for revenge, prejudice, health, stress, and so many other factors. Which is a frightening thought when considering that someone else's life could depend on the quality of your judgment.
Saturday, October 13, 2007
A night with the JCC
On Tuesday, I went to my friend Steven Lee Beeber's reading/panel discussion at the Black Cat about his book The Heebie Jeebies at CBGBs (www.jewpunk.com for more info), sponsored by the Jewish Community Center. The reading was great, but the panel left something to be desired. In a previous discussion I had with Steve about the difference between New York punk and DC punk, we mentioned that the DC scene is humorless, and the two DC scenester panelists proved us right. They didn't look like they were having much fun. Maybe they were just afraid of the silent judgment of DC punk legend Ian MacKaye, who was in the audience after we received information that he wouldn't make it. Still, it was a great night. Good crowd, fun venue, and Steve sold a lot of books. I even got a shoutout before the reading began, since I helped him find the perfect outfit for his DC debut.
The Bio Channel's Notorious had a show about a murdered Oklahoma cheerleader the other night, and three teenage boys were the main suspects. One was from the wrong side of the tracks, the other two were good students and athletes. One of the investigators was positive that Randy Woods, one of the suspects, couldn't have been the ringleader because he was in school and "played football." Since when does being a high school athlete make someone incapable of murder? Another straight-A student and star three-sport athlete from Texas made his biggest headlines as part of the most infamous murder case of the 1960s; Charles "Tex" Watson, a member of Charles Manson's "Family." If there's one thing I've learned from studying serial killers and other violent criminals, it's that we never know what anyone's capable of, being rich or smart or attractive or athletic does not mean that there's no violence simmering under the surface.
The Bio Channel's Notorious had a show about a murdered Oklahoma cheerleader the other night, and three teenage boys were the main suspects. One was from the wrong side of the tracks, the other two were good students and athletes. One of the investigators was positive that Randy Woods, one of the suspects, couldn't have been the ringleader because he was in school and "played football." Since when does being a high school athlete make someone incapable of murder? Another straight-A student and star three-sport athlete from Texas made his biggest headlines as part of the most infamous murder case of the 1960s; Charles "Tex" Watson, a member of Charles Manson's "Family." If there's one thing I've learned from studying serial killers and other violent criminals, it's that we never know what anyone's capable of, being rich or smart or attractive or athletic does not mean that there's no violence simmering under the surface.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
The raising of a serial killer
Yes, I'm back to my favorite topic. I was watching an episode of Notorious about David Berkowitz, and, unlike many killers, he had generally good things to say about his adoptive parents, but adds that their love "wasn't enough" to ease his violent mind. His troubles with meeting his birth mother is another, tragic story, but Berkowitz managed to have parents who cared about him. His adoptive father expressed surprise and distress at hearing the news about his son. Jeffrey Dahmer's father Lionel, who wrote a book called A Father's Story that I highly recommend, expressed his grief about his son's troubled mind, and his struggle to reconcile his rational mind with his son's irrational actions. Lionel's troubled marriage with Jeffrey's mother, which lead to constant fighting and an eventual divorce, likely caused some strife in the Dahmer house.
Nathan Berkowitz and Lionel Dahmer are the exception, not the rule, in the families of serial killers. Gary Heidnik, who kept women captive in his basement, killing two, had a father who said he "wasn't interested" in his son's trial and conviction, and when Gary was young and wet his bed, his father displayed the soiled sheets on the front lawn. The lives of serial killers are filled with stories of people who should never have been allowed to have children. As Berkowitz and Dahmer displayed, a traumatic upbringing isn't the only factor that creates a killer, but it's a common element in the lives of violent criminals. Edmund Kemper's mother ridiculed his appearance, told him no woman would ever love him, and locked him in the basement because she thought he would molest his sister. Kemper's crimes against women were seen as him lashing out against his mother, and when he killed her, he turned himself in. Ed Gein, the inspiration for Norman Bates, has a religious fanatic mother who drove away his few friends by telling him they came from less pious families, making him believe that a boy's best friend is his mother. Ted Bundy, despite appearances of an idyllic childhood, was primarily raised by his grandfather, a vicious racist and wife-beater. Charles Manson was born to a 16-year-old prostitute and was raised by his uncle, who beat him and punished him by sending him to school in a dress. Henry Lee Lucas' mother also punished him by putting him in dresses, and once hit him so hard with a two-by-four that he lost consciousness. Lucas launched his murder career by killing his mother during an argument. Albert DeSalvo, a serial rapist who was once thought to be the Boston Strangler, had an alcoholic father who beat his wife in front of Albert and his sister, and sold the two children into slavery. John Wayne Gacy's alcoholic father beat and belittled him relentlessly. But a troubled childhood isn't the only thing that went wrong with these men. Dahmer's brother and DeSalvo's sister didn't turn into criminals, although they were raised in the same environment as their infamous siblings. And as Berkowitz said, sometimes a loving family isn't enough to stop the violent thoughts. The origin of the criminal mind remains a mystery.
Although I still don't have another job, I'm in slightly better spirits these days. Bound has a new home, I know I have friends around, and finally, Prison Break is back. Monday's season premiere had me on the edge of my seat. The Company's latest evil plan had me shouting at the screen, and I'm hoping for a reluctant Michael/Mahone alliance in the shithole Panamanian prison they now inhabit. That rat bastard T-Bag has gotten in good with the gangster-like prison ringleader, in typical psychopathic fashion. I think this season is going to be a good one, with the stories set up in the premiere.
Nathan Berkowitz and Lionel Dahmer are the exception, not the rule, in the families of serial killers. Gary Heidnik, who kept women captive in his basement, killing two, had a father who said he "wasn't interested" in his son's trial and conviction, and when Gary was young and wet his bed, his father displayed the soiled sheets on the front lawn. The lives of serial killers are filled with stories of people who should never have been allowed to have children. As Berkowitz and Dahmer displayed, a traumatic upbringing isn't the only factor that creates a killer, but it's a common element in the lives of violent criminals. Edmund Kemper's mother ridiculed his appearance, told him no woman would ever love him, and locked him in the basement because she thought he would molest his sister. Kemper's crimes against women were seen as him lashing out against his mother, and when he killed her, he turned himself in. Ed Gein, the inspiration for Norman Bates, has a religious fanatic mother who drove away his few friends by telling him they came from less pious families, making him believe that a boy's best friend is his mother. Ted Bundy, despite appearances of an idyllic childhood, was primarily raised by his grandfather, a vicious racist and wife-beater. Charles Manson was born to a 16-year-old prostitute and was raised by his uncle, who beat him and punished him by sending him to school in a dress. Henry Lee Lucas' mother also punished him by putting him in dresses, and once hit him so hard with a two-by-four that he lost consciousness. Lucas launched his murder career by killing his mother during an argument. Albert DeSalvo, a serial rapist who was once thought to be the Boston Strangler, had an alcoholic father who beat his wife in front of Albert and his sister, and sold the two children into slavery. John Wayne Gacy's alcoholic father beat and belittled him relentlessly. But a troubled childhood isn't the only thing that went wrong with these men. Dahmer's brother and DeSalvo's sister didn't turn into criminals, although they were raised in the same environment as their infamous siblings. And as Berkowitz said, sometimes a loving family isn't enough to stop the violent thoughts. The origin of the criminal mind remains a mystery.
Although I still don't have another job, I'm in slightly better spirits these days. Bound has a new home, I know I have friends around, and finally, Prison Break is back. Monday's season premiere had me on the edge of my seat. The Company's latest evil plan had me shouting at the screen, and I'm hoping for a reluctant Michael/Mahone alliance in the shithole Panamanian prison they now inhabit. That rat bastard T-Bag has gotten in good with the gangster-like prison ringleader, in typical psychopathic fashion. I think this season is going to be a good one, with the stories set up in the premiere.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Bound's first night at Expo
I haven't posted in a while, being in semi-hibernation after quitting my job two weeks ago, but I made it out to Bound for its debut at Expo, just off U Street. The bar sucks (they need more than one bartender) and the bathroom has a smell that would overpower any other public bathroom, and has a strange tumor-like mass in the corner. Other than those things, I had a good time. There's a nice dance floor, a small but effective play space, and tables to sit and hang out with friends, which is one of the major reasons I go to Bound.
Congratulations to Johnny (DJ Panic) and his wife Erin on their first anniversary, which we celebrated last night. I'm happy for them, but Johnny's announcement got me thinking about what's missing from my life, and got me depressed, forcing me to leave earlier than I would have liked. I went home, listened to the Smiths and wrote in my journal about all the guys who ignored, abandoned and rejected me. I met a guy last weekend and had a great time with him, but of course he hasn't called. They never do. I'm trying to figure out how I can learn how to interact with people so they'll want to seek me out to spend time with me, not just hang out when we meet up at the club. The socializing instincts most people are born with and can easily develop are missing in my mind, and it's caused a lot of loneliness and misery. Still, I've managed to meet some great people. I just need to learn more about friendship and relationships.
Congratulations to Johnny (DJ Panic) and his wife Erin on their first anniversary, which we celebrated last night. I'm happy for them, but Johnny's announcement got me thinking about what's missing from my life, and got me depressed, forcing me to leave earlier than I would have liked. I went home, listened to the Smiths and wrote in my journal about all the guys who ignored, abandoned and rejected me. I met a guy last weekend and had a great time with him, but of course he hasn't called. They never do. I'm trying to figure out how I can learn how to interact with people so they'll want to seek me out to spend time with me, not just hang out when we meet up at the club. The socializing instincts most people are born with and can easily develop are missing in my mind, and it's caused a lot of loneliness and misery. Still, I've managed to meet some great people. I just need to learn more about friendship and relationships.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Is Bound in trouble?
I have received very distressing news about my favorite DC club event, Bound. First, the on-premise SMB v2.0 was postponed due to lack of RSVPs. And now I hear that Bound will no longer be at the R&R Lounge, which is an awesome place in Chinatown and very Metro-accessible, most likely due to lack of attendance that failed to impress the club's owners. To all DC residents looking for a good goth club, go to Bound. Don't let the BDSM elements scare you, there's no pressure to participate. Until Bound gets a new venue, where will I go to satisfy my goth and BDSM cravings? I'd go to Chronos, but I'll have to take a cab home, and the cabs here can never find my place in Takoma without a lot of effort. And Midnight is circling the drain in terms of quality of attendance and music. I just hope the new Bound venue isn't back at Lime or somewhere else in the dark corners of DC, far from the Metro, where sometimes I don't bother taking the trouble to go out that far. If any club owner wants to give Bound a shot, I will do my best to bring up attendance to give this event a permanent home for anyone like me who needs this weekly gathering of cool freaks.
Monday, August 27, 2007
Another Bush official bites the dust
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20459457/?GT1=10252
Alberto Gonzales, the controversial Attorney General, has resigned. "President" Bush just cannot hold on to his cabinet. Even the ever-loyal Karl Rove announced his resignation earlier this month, and now Gonzales, who steadfastly supported Bush's domestic wiretapping program, is leaving the administration amid allegations that he fired US attorneys under suspicious circumstances and that he lied to Congress about the circumstances of the firings. Who will be next in the Bush camp to defect? This is turning into a political version of Survivor: Who will be the last cabinet member standing by Bush's side?
Now to my favorite subject, violent criminals. I saw a show about Richard Speck (Notorious on the Biography Channel, the best show for people like me), who slaughtered eight student nurses in Chicago in one night in 1966. Like many violent offenders, Speck had a troubled childhood, his father died when he was very young, and his stepfather was a violent alcoholic. As a teenager, Speck began a career of petty burglary and was discharged from the merchant marines for erratic behavior. He married while still a teenager, and supposedly beat his wife. At the time of the mass murder of the nurses, Speck was broke and drinking heavily. Was he lashing out at the world that had not been kind to him, like so many mass murderers? But one of the victims was also raped and tortured before being killed, so it was a more personal crime that the blind rage of Charles Whitman and Cho of Virginia Tech. A commentator in the show said that Speck was not a monster, like we want all our criminals to be, but maybe he was "all too human." The thought that a serial killer or a mass murderer is "all too human" is a difficult one. It implies that we as a species are inherently violent, or have the seeds of viciousness in our genetic makeup, as a recent book (that I have yet to read) argues. But under conditions like those faced by Speck, a history of abuse and disappointments, who wouldn't at least think about lashing out? Most of us have better impulse control than to act on these feelings, but I can personally attest that the feelings exist.
Alberto Gonzales, the controversial Attorney General, has resigned. "President" Bush just cannot hold on to his cabinet. Even the ever-loyal Karl Rove announced his resignation earlier this month, and now Gonzales, who steadfastly supported Bush's domestic wiretapping program, is leaving the administration amid allegations that he fired US attorneys under suspicious circumstances and that he lied to Congress about the circumstances of the firings. Who will be next in the Bush camp to defect? This is turning into a political version of Survivor: Who will be the last cabinet member standing by Bush's side?
Now to my favorite subject, violent criminals. I saw a show about Richard Speck (Notorious on the Biography Channel, the best show for people like me), who slaughtered eight student nurses in Chicago in one night in 1966. Like many violent offenders, Speck had a troubled childhood, his father died when he was very young, and his stepfather was a violent alcoholic. As a teenager, Speck began a career of petty burglary and was discharged from the merchant marines for erratic behavior. He married while still a teenager, and supposedly beat his wife. At the time of the mass murder of the nurses, Speck was broke and drinking heavily. Was he lashing out at the world that had not been kind to him, like so many mass murderers? But one of the victims was also raped and tortured before being killed, so it was a more personal crime that the blind rage of Charles Whitman and Cho of Virginia Tech. A commentator in the show said that Speck was not a monster, like we want all our criminals to be, but maybe he was "all too human." The thought that a serial killer or a mass murderer is "all too human" is a difficult one. It implies that we as a species are inherently violent, or have the seeds of viciousness in our genetic makeup, as a recent book (that I have yet to read) argues. But under conditions like those faced by Speck, a history of abuse and disappointments, who wouldn't at least think about lashing out? Most of us have better impulse control than to act on these feelings, but I can personally attest that the feelings exist.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Russian serial killer arrested
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20247477/
As if Russians didn't have enough to worry about with its corrupt and possibly homicidal government, the murderer of at least 49 people has just been arrested. Alexander Pichushkin has confessed to over 60 murders, but there is only evidence in 49, which brings him short of Andrei Chikatilo's record of 53 confirmed killings.
Pichushkin's first murder was at 18, when he killed a classmate. The article doesn't say much about his methods, preferred victims or motives, but he says that he feels compelled to kill, that it was a necessity in his life. How this compulsion started, he doesn't say, and there isn't any information available about his past that would shed a light on this. With many serial killers, the drive to kill comes from fantasies that grow more intense, until they feel they have no choice but to act on them. But since fantasies are always perfect, and reality rarely is, the killer is left unfulfilled, and hopes the next time will be better, which leads to a string of murders before the killer is caught.
Pichushkin's bloated sense of importance, in his statement about being responsible for sending his victims "to the next life" as being a "father" to them, is also common among serial killers. Ted Bundy once said he felt like a god as he felt his victims die. He also echoed Pichushkin in his explanation of his motives, "I just liked to kill."
Pichushkin was caught when a videotape showed him with a victim right before she was killed. The victim also had a piece of paper with his name and phone number. Why would a killer give his victim his real name? Did he want to be caught? Was it a lapse in judgement? Or was it Bundy-style arrogance? A court psychiatrist has labeled Pichushkin as sane, and, from a legal standpoint, he probably is. His actions are inconceivable to most of us, but the level of thought and consideration he put into his crimes and his explanation of them indicates a sound, but diseased, mind. He knew exactly what he was doing when he did it, and enjoyed it.
As if Russians didn't have enough to worry about with its corrupt and possibly homicidal government, the murderer of at least 49 people has just been arrested. Alexander Pichushkin has confessed to over 60 murders, but there is only evidence in 49, which brings him short of Andrei Chikatilo's record of 53 confirmed killings.
Pichushkin's first murder was at 18, when he killed a classmate. The article doesn't say much about his methods, preferred victims or motives, but he says that he feels compelled to kill, that it was a necessity in his life. How this compulsion started, he doesn't say, and there isn't any information available about his past that would shed a light on this. With many serial killers, the drive to kill comes from fantasies that grow more intense, until they feel they have no choice but to act on them. But since fantasies are always perfect, and reality rarely is, the killer is left unfulfilled, and hopes the next time will be better, which leads to a string of murders before the killer is caught.
Pichushkin's bloated sense of importance, in his statement about being responsible for sending his victims "to the next life" as being a "father" to them, is also common among serial killers. Ted Bundy once said he felt like a god as he felt his victims die. He also echoed Pichushkin in his explanation of his motives, "I just liked to kill."
Pichushkin was caught when a videotape showed him with a victim right before she was killed. The victim also had a piece of paper with his name and phone number. Why would a killer give his victim his real name? Did he want to be caught? Was it a lapse in judgement? Or was it Bundy-style arrogance? A court psychiatrist has labeled Pichushkin as sane, and, from a legal standpoint, he probably is. His actions are inconceivable to most of us, but the level of thought and consideration he put into his crimes and his explanation of them indicates a sound, but diseased, mind. He knew exactly what he was doing when he did it, and enjoyed it.
Monday, August 13, 2007
Rove steps down
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/rove_resigning
At least that's the official story. Who knows how much power he will continue to wield unofficially. Some insiders are claiming that the Scooter Libby trial was just a way to cover for Rove, the real leaker of CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity. A big show of a trial and conviction, later to be overturned by "President" Bush in a move that outraged his critics, it is a good way to deflect attention and scrutiny from Rove. Rove should have at least five life sentences by now, for all his lying and deceit and backhanded tricks in helping to run the country. Libby might have been a liar and a cheat, but he was nothing compared to "Bush's Brain."
In other government conspiracy news, a great moment in Bolshevik history. I was watching one of my favorite cable shows last night, Infamous Murders on History International, and it mentioned a Bulgarian dissident who was murdered after his broadcasts accusing the communist dictatorship in the country of corruption. The cause of death was poison, and he was murdered in England, which sounds dangerously similar to the recent death of a Russian exile and critic of Putin's regime. And the Bulgarian murder was on the dictator's birthday, like the journalist who was recently murdered on Putin's birthday after criticizing Russian policies and Putin's administration.
At least that's the official story. Who knows how much power he will continue to wield unofficially. Some insiders are claiming that the Scooter Libby trial was just a way to cover for Rove, the real leaker of CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity. A big show of a trial and conviction, later to be overturned by "President" Bush in a move that outraged his critics, it is a good way to deflect attention and scrutiny from Rove. Rove should have at least five life sentences by now, for all his lying and deceit and backhanded tricks in helping to run the country. Libby might have been a liar and a cheat, but he was nothing compared to "Bush's Brain."
In other government conspiracy news, a great moment in Bolshevik history. I was watching one of my favorite cable shows last night, Infamous Murders on History International, and it mentioned a Bulgarian dissident who was murdered after his broadcasts accusing the communist dictatorship in the country of corruption. The cause of death was poison, and he was murdered in England, which sounds dangerously similar to the recent death of a Russian exile and critic of Putin's regime. And the Bulgarian murder was on the dictator's birthday, like the journalist who was recently murdered on Putin's birthday after criticizing Russian policies and Putin's administration.
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